010805

Morning ‘Camp’ers,

Fun news this weekend and interesting to follow the views of folk on the news forums. Some people will reel off one apology after the next and let’s face it find just about any excuse to excuse the inexcusable. Someone asked if the 21st July’ers would have preferred to have been blown up? Which would you prefer, to look at just your wife’s eyes once a week for the rest of your life with the occasional buggering or 72 Virgins to work your way through?

Calls for the woman who fired the airgun at the ground, when she should have been shooting yobs, to get her job back. I say reinstate her and give her a proper gun and some training, she's a lousy shot.

Duck heaven around the end of the Met line this morning, in two minds whether to tube all the way to the Dilly or continue the work on the gorgeousness of my legs.

Rayners Lane and two enormous black women join me in my 6-booth. The one opposite must be the chiefs senior wife as she takes up almost half the whole seat with her pampered behind. I try to catch an accent but it’s impossible to hear through Loaded (Pulkas). Number 1 sneers over at me, “Call that a man, what’s a girl supposed to do with that skinny white ass? 100 kg’s of white boy is no good to a real wooomaarn”. She get’s off at Finchley Road and leaves number 2, I imagine she needs a bio break due to her blood ‘rice and peas’ levels becoming dangerously low. I see ad’ for datingdirect.co.uk, what other sort is there? datingproxy.co.uk sounds no fun.

Middle aged quality woman is across the way, stilettos showing off 4 slightly wrinkled toe cleavages. Damn sexy but take care ladies of a certain age not to squeeze tits in in similar fashion, not sure that works as well?

I was in some large store on Saturday, one of the ones resembling a jumble sale at this time of the year, the ones that attract all the wrong sort. Disposable tee shirts required for imminent holiday, the type that you don’t mind getting Piz on, is my excuse. Woman with two brats and piss-smelling Zelda Granny seem to be following me around.

Baker St : I decide to walk - surprisingly it’s not raining, and indeed for the remainder of my early morning stroll. The size 30 French designer shop is having a ‘massive sale’, unnecessary tautology – CD realizes he has fallen into same trap and uses unnecessary unnecessarily. Man in White full-length dress and sandals with headgear outside Kuwait Airlines, no camel in sight.

8am on Oxford St is pretty quiet. CD hums in anticipation: “You could see that Pierre did truly love the madamoiselle”. But Next have “Further reductions” blackout and I’m unable to see Mia. ”C'est la vie", say the old folks, it goes to show you never can tell. “Further reductions” on AA? - that would be Boy. Never mind, the honies in the ZARA display had previously taken my eye, how fickle is that of the newly categorized skinny arsed pink pig? Benetton also have great display, nothing here for you chiefy.

Isn’t it fun watching foreigners try and negotiate the roads of W1/SW1? Follow Pinky guys.

CD 010805