040805

Morning ‘Camp’ers,

Momentous day, Piccadilly line is reopened. One arrives first and poor woman misses it having legged-it down Swakeleys stairs. There’ll be another one along soon there hasn’t been one for 4 weeks and ‘isn’t it always like that’? No, Met arrives disproving old wives theory.

Latest news : Tube suspect is charged by Italians – not properly guys, give the chair more volts!. 600% increase in religious hate crime, I could be responsible for all of that, when does an ogle become a hate crime? Of the hundreds of Asian lovelies I’ve looked at there’s the ones I’ve also thought about hurting, in a manly, loving, non-hateful sort of way of course.

Sean Kelly out after 8 or so years in jail, that’s about 10months for each of the 10 people he murdered. But it’s OK because the IRA says they ‘won’t do it again’. Perhaps they could reform the penal system in line with this; how do you plead, guilty, not guilty or won’t do it again? I hear you get 3-5 years these days for nicking someone’s mobile phone in an aggravated fashion. Millions too poor to buy food from full market in Niger. Thinks of well know adage “Charity begins 1000’s of miles away”.

Baker Street: No signs of perfect ‘dusky maiden’ WPCs today. Discriminatory recruitment policy unfortunately not working.

Courier van pulls up outside HSBC on Baker Street – no unloading stripes, CD spots traffic warden in distance I stop, observe and think what a great thing immigration has done getting people in to do jobs that the indigenous population won’t do.

Further down a pretty girl with flowery dress passes by, she’s exposing lots of chest and it’s jiggling quite some. “They’re damn fine don’t you think piggy?” Indeed they are and there’s no harm in being proud, but do you think they’re appropriate exhibits for an office environment? Imagine if all across London girls were being irresponsible and selfishly not thinking about productivity and economic indicators. “Look, a girl’s gotta do what a girls gotta do to get Jimmy Choos Shoes” Well perhaps I can help you out there love, “Shoes for Sh“, but she’s gone before I can finish and I’ll perhaps never know. I wonder how male productivity in her office will be today, perhaps a company cardy scheme would be wise or maybe an addendum to her office door name plate to save speculation at least. *** A Proudchest, 36C, no bra or nicks *** - that should sort out the shoes also love. If not New Bond St, 8.15 tomorrow morning.

Tanning sale on Oxford Street, hey I’ll smack bottoms for free girls.

Walking down Regent Street I think how useful a pig rating-scale for big people would be. I’ve been working on conversion from streaky to back (bacon) myself but I’m only on shoulder at the moment. I really think a cheap cut suits me best though. That reminds me I did see an enormous extra streaky with flip-flops on the met this morning, but I’ll save you the trotter stories.

CD 040805